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| Photo of the labyrinth I walked by Amy, 2015. |
The best thing about a labyrinth is
that it’s a physical meditation of your body in motion as you journey
internally. You can walk the same labyrinth every day and feel like each day is
a new journey. Sometimes I use the labyrinth as a means to petition my
ancestors, and the seven-circuit labyrinth is my favorite.
I recently attended a candle-lit
labyrinth on the beach, beneath a starry sky, organized by a woman I have had
the great pleasure to study with and work with, Tracy Andryc, a Veriditas
Certified Labyrinth Facilitator. I emerged from the woods after leading an
Evening Devotional in the Ancestor Shrine and travelled across the sand,
bringing my ancestors with me. I stepped into the labyrinth with a purpose.
As I put each foot in front of the
other in the first circuit, I allowed myself to sink deeper into the earth. I
sank down through the layer we trod on, through the layer the burrowing animals
and insects live in, through the layer where the bones and ashes of our dead
are buried. At this layer, I began to call to them.
In the second track I called to my
grandparents, to the four who have crossed over, two of whom I knew, beloved to
me. I thought they would live forever. Specifically,
I called on my father’s father. I have one solid memory of him before his death
when I was seven. And I called on my father’s mother, who died when he was a
young boy. I focused my thoughts on them, and the other Rustons and Eatons in
their lines.
In the third track I opened to my eight
great-grandparents, to the Rustons and the Wickers, the Eatons and the Smiths.
Then I reached out to my sixteen 2x
great-grandparents on the fourth turn, those who saw the Civil War and the
beginning of the new century, the Rustons and Irelands, Wickers and Whitchers,
the Eatons and Tenneys, Smiths and Dutchers.
In the shortest track of the
labyrinth I called in my thirty-two 3x great-grandparents, those who forged new
wildernesses in a newer land, the Rustons and Richardsons, Irelands and Lentons,
Wickers and Lusks, Whitchers and Loziers, the Eatons and Treadwells, Tenneys
and Targees, Smiths and Sears, Dutchers and Birds.
In the sixth circuit, I felt my sixty-four
4x great-grandparents join me, the spirit door wide open. The Rustons, Richardsons,
Irelands, Lentons and Wilsons, Wickers and Morgans, Lusks, Whitchers/Whittiers
and Kittredges, DeLoziers and Raymonds, the Eatons and Goulds, Treadwells, Tenneys,
Targees and Smiths, Sears and Dubois’, Dutchers and Feagles, Birds and Marshes…
and those lines unknown.
On the last path, I opened to all one-hundred
and twenty-five of my 5x great-grandparents. The Rustons, Richardsons, Irelands,
Lentons and Wrights, Wilsons, Wickers and Parkers, Morgans, Lusks, Whittiers
and Dows, Kittredges and Baileys, DeLoziers and Erkells, Raymonds and Richmonds,
the Eatons and Skiffs, Goulds and Arnolds, Treadwells, Tenneys and Darbys,
Targees and Tourgees, Smiths, Sears and Andrews, Dubois’, Dutchers and Palmers,
Feagles, Birds and Colemans, Marshes… and those lines unknown.
I was at a threshold, crossing over
with two-hundred and fifty-four ancestors beside and behind me, the collective
spirits of the first seven generations of my family tree. I made two hundred
and fifty-five. I walked in ancestral fire. At the center there was a door. I am the door. In the center and called
my father’s parents into the center of labyrinth.
They came immediately, young
together in my vision, holding a baby made of light. I had meant to petition
them to be with the family, to watch over my uncle, their son. I was prepared
to sweat through the work and will them in from the ether, and I laughed to
find them waiting. They were already holding him, watching over him, encircling
him in love and healing light.
Ruth looked at me. Ruth, the
grandmother whose line I take after genetically, the grandmother I never knew.
Her face was warm and full of love and gratitude. Her eyes smiled. I saw myself,
and my sister, my father and my uncle dancing in her face.
But when she smiled at me, I saw
her. Only her. In the center of the labyrinth I felt the love of a woman I
couldn’t know. Death is not the end.
Mark and Ruth smiled at me. The
baby in their arms clapped his hands in something akin to original joy. I knew
he was being watched over and I felt overwhelming peace and love fill my heart.
I stepped out of the center and stared up into the sky, at the stars in the
mountains, dusted across the black expanse and I cried, tears of joy and tears
of release.
I walked out of the labyrinth
lighter, crossing paths with other journeyers. With each step I took I thanked
my ancestors for walking with me. And I know they are with me in all the
moments of my life.
*
“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why
on earth should that mean that it is not real?”
~Dumbledore, Harry Potter and the
Deathly Hallows
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