Remember...

Ancestral energy lives in the stars above us, the stones beneath us. Their memory gathers in oceans, rivers and seas. It hums its silent wisdom within the body of every tree.

Wednesday, December 12, 2018

A Dream Visitation From Zami


One of the easiest methods for spirits to communicate with us is through our dreams. People with vivid and active dream lives are extra sensitive to this energy and more likely to experience and recall them. Everyone perceives the sensory nature of visitations differently. In sharing my own, I hope to help others discover their own methods of connection.

A year ago our 22 year-old tiger cat passed away. Zami was with me for most of my adult firsts. She was our companion, more like a third partner. Even the cranky-old-lady-who-slept-twenty-three-hours-a-day's loss left an emptiness in our home. It ebbed when I wasn't looking. The new silence became the new normal. And life continued on.

Then I had a dream last night. In it I was walking through our living room and I looked over to see her curled up and sleeping beneath our tree. I got halfway across the room before my sarah-brain noted that I wasn't having a hey-look-my-dead-cat-is-in-this-one, but rather a Holy Shit Spirit Zami is Visiting! 

For me the difference is obvious, like the difference between the quality of a show shot on videotape versus a movie shot on film. Only the spirit visitor is one version overlaid atop the main dream. They're impossible for me not to notice.

And there Zami was. I approached her tentatively, afraid she'd vanish after I noticed her. I called her name and she opened one eye at me before closing it again, ignoring my presence. (That's another way I knew it was her, lol.) And then I touched her. There was a pang for a moment, as if I had forgotten how she felt beneath my palm and the memory woke again in me. 

I touched her and she leaned into it as her fucking-loud-ass-purr-machine revved into overdrive. When she was alive she could purr so loud for so long that when she stopped in the night it would wake me. 

In the dream I was crying. It hurt. You move on but you never get over it. I forgot how visceral her loss was until I was touching her again. For a moment it feels like a horribly awful trick, not a gift. I miss her so much. 

My heart hurts thinking about it now. But I wouldn't change it. I wouldn't wish it away for I am reminded of how much I loved her and how much I love her still.

2 comments:

  1. I had a best friend for 10 years who was part-shepherd, part-lab, and part human. With Katie as my companion and protector, I was able to live as an independent woman through my 20s, which was a true gift. She passed within a month after my now-husband moved in. It was as though she said, "I've watched over her for 10 years. Now I'm passing that on to you." That was in 1985.

    I participated in a Vision Quest in 2000. The preparation time took 6 months. I grew more and more nervous as we reached the threshold of my 3-day Quest-in-the-Woods. What if I didn't get a vision, after all this work?

    The night before I began my stay in the woods, I had a dream. In it, I was walking down a pine-needle-carpeted path in a green wood. I looked to my left side and saw Katie walking next to me! I grew excited to see her, and she morphed into a black bear (one of my totems), running beside me! As I began to run, I lifted up and began to fly! I woke from that dream knowing all would be well on my Quest.

    My Quest location was in the woods under a huge pine tree, thickly carpeted with pine needles that added beauty and comfort to my 3-day stay. There were also a few smaller trees that had fallen over through time, were eroded and partly covered with pine needles. One small pine was located just outside of my circle and its roots were worn down to long nubs by the weather over the year. Over the next couple of days, as my mind altered in the woods, I realized that those roots represented (and even looked like!) Katie as she would lie in a room with me, her head on her paws, watching me with her ears perked up, waiting to see what I would do/where I would go next.

    What comfort our four-legged friends bring us! Thank you for sharing about Zami so that I could revisit Katie and her constant presence of love and protection.

    Kate

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  2. Thank you for sharing, Kate! That's wonderful. These experiences help show me that the people and beings we make connections with... those connections transcend the physical world, even if we cannot put real words to it.

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